Why does the cerebral narcissist insist on having promiscuous and dysregulated women as his partners? Why doesn’t he target asexual or sex-averse women (for example: victims of abuse or hyposexual)? After all, he is aware of his essential asexuality. He enjoys sex only when he is grooming a new partner for an emerging shared fantasy. Once the partner is acquired and secured, he becomes celibate and loses all interest in sex. So, why go through the inevitable deception and acrimony in the wake of ineluctable sexlessness?
1. To convert his partner into a bad, persecutory object, thereby justifying and perpetuating the cerebral’s morally superior victim stance (Gabay’s Tendency for Interpersonal Victimhood, TIV);
2. To reenact early childhood traumas with his rejecting and absent mother;
3. To test his partner’s unconditional love and allegiance;
4. To control his partner via her guilt and shame over her inevitable misbehavior with men as she seeks to cater to her most basic needs of love, intimacy, and sex;
5. It legitimizes defiance and contempt for his partner and restores a sense of grandiosity: she has to answer for her misdeeds, deceive, act, pretend, and be scared while the cerebral observes her pitiful squirming smugly and forgives her magnanimously;
6. Allowing his partner total freedom also guarantees that she will stay out of the cerebral’s affairs and let him be and delight in solitary pursuits within his solipsistic black hole (schizoid style).
The cerebral narcissist detests his body and resents it as an encumbrance and a maintenance chore. He neglects it egregiously.
Most cerebrals are also schizoids, so they derive no pleasure from any physical activity, sex included.
Everything the cerebral does is colored by this corporeal self-disavowal. He reverts to the somatic type and actually revels in profuse and imaginative sex only when he is hunting for a new intimate partner to embed in a nascent shared fantasy. Mission accomplished, he reverts to celibate hibernation.
Similarly, if he is a sadist, his sadism is likely to be psychological, not physical. Only in the somatic grooming phase, his sex is sadistic. And he is repelled by physical pain and suffering as he is revolted by anything bodily.
Nothingness: Antidote to Narcissism Playlist https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vzBf9QvClo&list=PLsh_y_ett4o3RTSj7sW28ykk51HfHMNXQ